Walking My Dog

On most evenings, weather permitting, I take my dog Aiden for a walk.

Walking your dog is supposed to be good for both you and the dog.  It relieves stress and anxiety in both of you.  Most of the time, I would agree that this is true. But today, this beautiful spring day, similar to the one a little over a year ago, I thought of Haylee walking Lola. (I think my grief angel, Clarence, just wanted to pay a visit.)

So, I'm walking around the park, with the sunshine in my eyes, smiling and greeting other walker's I pass.  I remember thinking of how happy Haylee must have been that 9th day of April, as she walked her dog.  I remember that thoughts like that gave me peace then and give me peace now as I think about them again.

But my thoughts are not always like that, as sometimes I choose to be afraid to walk my dog; Afraid that I may get hit by a car as I do it.  I don't feel safe.  Everytime I see a black Ford Focus, I think of the car that struck Haylee.  It is times like that when I have to take a breath, and look up to the clear blue sky and sunshine and remember that life is good and Haylee was happy at the end of her life.

Comments

Post a Comment

Popular posts from this blog

5 Days Post Haylee

Image
It has been five days.  The grieving process has begun for myself and many around me.  It's a  beast this thing called grief.  It attaches to or attacks each of us differently.  When my mother lost my sister Barb, she named her grief George.  I think I too will have a name for my grief.  I've been thinking about Clarence.  I always loved the character Clarence Odbody.    He was only doing what was right and tried to have a little fun along the way.  He kept things simple.  I like simple.  I won't mind if Clarence hangs around awhile. "Strange, isn't it? Each man's life touches so many other lives, and when he isn't around he leaves an awful hole, doesn't he?
Read more

2nd Week

Image
As Advent began, I found myself still struggling, so I got myself a couple of props. First I purchased little battery operated purple and rose votives. It had been a long time since I used an advent wreath so this is a compromise. I must say that it helps.
Read more

Will Advent Help?

Image
As an adult, Christmas has not been my favorite time of year. It seemed to remind me of all I did not have. Somehow I managed to make the best of it and survived. That's just it, I've been surviving the holidays, not enjoying the holidays. I need to do a better job at living Christmas. Raised a Catholic, advent is no stranger to me. Or is it? What does advent mean? What is it to me? Advent is a time for reflection. It is a time to prepare. It is a time for prayer. With my new job, I have more time. I have less stress. What am I doing with this time? Today, I will take a serious look into my advent prayers. Prayers that I've fallen away from. Prayers for peace in our country. Prayers with hope for all good things. Prayers for love. Prayers to renew my faith in a loving God. Dear Jesus, As I enter the advent season, prepare in me a place for you. Use me to be evidence of your life. Use me to help others come to know you. I pray for my children, Derri
Read more