One week ago, my very large family, on my mom's side celebrated their 53rd annual reunion. We wore our derby best to the party on Saturday night. We sure know how to throw a party!
It has been five days. The grieving process has begun for myself and many around me. It's a beast this thing called grief. It attaches to or attacks each of us differently. When my mother lost my sister Barb, she named her grief George. I think I too will have a name for my grief. I've been thinking about Clarence. I always loved the character Clarence Odbody. He was only doing what was right and tried to have a little fun along the way. He kept things simple. I like simple. I won't mind if Clarence hangs around awhile. "Strange, isn't it? Each man's life touches so many other lives, and when he isn't around he leaves an awful hole, doesn't he?
As Advent began, I found myself still struggling, so I got myself a couple of props. First I purchased little battery operated purple and rose votives. It had been a long time since I used an advent wreath so this is a compromise. I must say that it helps.
As an adult, Christmas has not been my favorite time of year. It seemed to remind me of all I did not have. Somehow I managed to make the best of it and survived. That's just it, I've been surviving the holidays, not enjoying the holidays. I need to do a better job at living Christmas. Raised a Catholic, advent is no stranger to me. Or is it? What does advent mean? What is it to me? Advent is a time for reflection. It is a time to prepare. It is a time for prayer. With my new job, I have more time. I have less stress. What am I doing with this time? Today, I will take a serious look into my advent prayers. Prayers that I've fallen away from. Prayers for peace in our country. Prayers with hope for all good things. Prayers for love. Prayers to renew my faith in a loving God. Dear Jesus, As I enter the advent season, prepare in me a place for you. Use me to be evidence of your life. Use me to help others come to know you. I pray for my children, Derri
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